


It's All Pretend (Till Someone Falls)

by flipflop_diva



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Angst and Fluff and Smut, Avengers Family, Avengers Tower, Clint Is a Good Bro, F/F, Minor Bruce Banner - Freeform, Minor Clint Barton, Minor Pepper Potts - Freeform, Minor Steve Rogers - Freeform, Natasha Needs a Hug, Post-Captain America: The Winter Soldier, Semi-explicit sex
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-12-21
Updated: 2014-12-21
Packaged: 2018-03-02 14:29:07
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,707
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2815466
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/flipflop_diva/pseuds/flipflop_diva
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It wouldn't be a Tony Stark party if someone didn't end up featured in the tabloids. Except that was never part of the plan.</p>
<p>AKA the time Maria and Natasha made out at a party and it ended up in the gossip column and then Maria got pissed and Natasha ... well, Natasha did what Natasha does best. (Set at an unspecified time after Captain America: The Winter Soldier)</p>
            </blockquote>





	It's All Pretend (Till Someone Falls)

**Author's Note:**

> For elasticella on LJ for the [1 Million Words](http://1-million-words.livejournal.com) Swap of Joy. She asked for a fake dating AU, but then this happened. She also asked for smut, fluff and humor — and, well, there's at least smut and attempted humor!

“Oh, _hell_ no.”

Maria’s voice cut through the morning chatter as heads turned to look at her, spoons halfway toward some mouths and other mouths stopping mid-chew of toast. She knew everyone was watching her, but her steely gaze was focused solely on one Tony Stark.

“Stark,” she hissed, her hands clenching the newspaper she had just picked up.

Instantly, Tony’s hands were in the air, in a sign of surrender. “It wasn’t me!” he practically shouted.

“It was _your_ party.” She glared.

“You know I don’t have pictures of things like that!”

Immediately, the kitchen was filled with muffled snorts. Pepper rolled her eyes.

“Okay, fine, I don’t _share_ pictures of things like that with the Page Six gossip column.”

Maria glared harder. “Then who did?”

Tony shrugged. “I have no idea.”

Maria’s glare intensified even more. But she didn’t say another word. Sometimes it wasn’t worth arguing with Tony. Instead she stuffed the newspaper under her arm, spun around and stalked off toward the elevator.

“Well, you two do make a very nice couple!” Tony shouted from behind her.

He ducked as a high-heeled boot came flying at his head, missing him and hitting Steve.

“Hey!” Steve said, rubbing at his arm. “Can you try not to insult people when we’re all in the same room?”

Beside Steve, Clint snorted. Bruce and Thor pretended not to be paying attention. Tony looked nonplussed.

“It wasn’t an insult,” Tony said as Maria stepped onto the elevator. “They do like nice together!” he yelled. And as the doors closed, Maria imagined he went back to his toast.

•••

Natasha’s reaction was decidedly less entertaining.

“Huh,” was all she said when she saw the second copy of the newspaper that just happened to be lying open on the kitchen counter, and then she disappeared to go take a shower.

Even Maria frowned after her at that one.

•••

By the time dinner was finished and people were adjoining to the common room for the evening, Maria had decided that it was probably possible that the men were single-handedly going to keep the newspaper industry alive if they could help it. She had found — and tossed — not less than forty different copies of the tabloid, all of them helpfully open to the photo of her and Natasha in a lip-lock (Maria’s hand _very obviously_ under Natasha’s shirt), the caption gleefully declaring that Black Widow had snagged her next victim (or perhaps she was caught in someone else’s web, it said).

Maria thought it was probably Tony — after all, mercilessly teasing was his thing — who was placing all the copies around the Tower, but Clint looked almost too amused and Bruce and Thor were almost so indifferent that she thought it might have secretly been them. The only people she didn’t suspect as the newspaper copy perpetrator were Steve, who was way too honest to do such a thing and then lie about it, and Pepper, who was essentially above all sorts of jokes and had been the least amused with the situation to begin with.

She turned the latest copy of the article — lying in the middle of the coffee table, although she could have sworn there was nothing there thirty seconds ago — over so an ad for the latest Broadway hit was facing up instead of the picture of the two of them and took a seat on the couch beside Natasha, who was staring at the movie playing on the flat-screen but didn’t seem to be really watching it.

Natasha didn’t move a muscle as Maria settled down, but she saw the guys all shift to get a better look at the two of them. She rolled her eyes.

“It doesn’t bother you?” she said to Natasha, her voice low but not low enough. 

Natasha lifted a shoulder and dropped it. “Why should it? They were there when it happened. They know the truth.”

“That’s not what I meant,” Maria said. Natasha’s eyes were still trained on the TV, but Maria saw her expression change just so.

“It’s not like people haven’t said a lot of things about me that aren’t true,” Natasha answered. 

Before Maria could even fully register her words, Natasha was on her feet, across the room and pressing the button for the elevator.

“Nat?” Clint called out, but it was too late. She was gone.

Maria narrowed her eyes at all the possible culprits. Tony, Bruce and Thor all had the decency to look guilty. Clint just looked concerned. Steve the innocent looked perplexed.

“Happy now?” Maria said.

No one answered.

•••

The newspaper articles disappeared after that. So did Natasha. Twenty-four hours later everyone was once again in the common room watching a movie, but their smallest member was quite obviously absent.

“Okay, she can’t be _that_ pissed at us, can she?” Tony said. “She didn’t even care when she saw it.”

Every head in the room swiveled to look at Clint. He pretended not to notice.

“Come on!” Tony finally said. “You know her best. What’s the deal?”

Clint finally tore his eyes away from the movie to look at all of them one by one. “Do you guys not know her at all?” he said. “She would kill all of us before she lets me spill her secrets.”

“Oh, come on,” Tony said. “We’re friends. She wouldn’t kill you. Or us.” He frowned. Bruce snorted.

“I am not so sure about that,” Bruce said.

“We can take her,” Tony said. “We’re five very strong guys. And two pretty badass women.” He pointed to Maria and Pepper.

“Again,” Clint said, “I say: You really don’t know her at all, do you?”

And he refused to say another word about it.

•••

Natasha was sitting at the kitchen table, eating a bowl of cereal like she hadn’t just been MIA for an entire day, when Maria walked in the next morning. No one else was around.

Natasha didn’t look at her, or even acknowledge her, though she obviously knew she was there, and Maria frowned as she went to the fridge to get out the orange juice.

“You okay?” Maria finally said to her, grabbing a glass from the cupboard.

“Mmmmm,” Natasha said, her normal non-committal way of telling people to not ask questions. Maria wasn’t most people, though.

“People were wondering where you were.”

“Busy.”

Now Maria knew _that_ was a lie. None of them were _busy_ these days. Sure, they had self-directed missions to take down Hydra operatives, but the days of SHIELD-assignment operations were long since over and most things they did, they did as a team. But Maria didn’t ask questions. She knew Natasha enough to know she wouldn’t tell her anyway. Instead she changed the subject.

“Pepper said we could get the paper to print a retraction if we wanted. She said just say the word.”

Maria poured her juice into a glass. Natasha looked up. Maria thought she saw a flicker of something across her face, but if there was, it wasn’t there long enough for her to decipher it.

“Up to you,” Natasha said. “I told you it doesn’t bother me.”

“Yeah, that. I don’t get that,” Maria said. She couldn’t help it. “You think the rest of us don’t know how much it bothers you to suddenly be in the public spotlight? You’ve spent your whole life hiding from people, but you’re suddenly okay with this?”

“Why wouldn’t I be?” Natasha said. “It’s not true, right?”

“Yeah, but …” Maria paused, as she turned to put the orange juice back in the refrigerator. 

When she turned back, Natasha was gone.

•••

“Okay, seriously,” Tony said out of nowhere. Bruce had just passed out giant bowls of popcorn, and a few seconds ago, Tony had been busy stuffing his face. “This is the third night in a row Little Red hasn’t come out to play. _What_ is going on with her?” He looked at Clint as he spoke. “How am I supposed to make fun of her and give her a hard time if she’s not here?”

“Because that is the important thing,” Bruce muttered. Tony ignored him.

“Come on, Clint,” he whined instead. “Tell us.”

“I told you guys …” Clint started, but Maria interrupted him. 

“Maybe you should tell us,” she said. “There’s obviously something wrong.”

Clint shook his head. “I am sworn to secrecy.”

“Ughhh,” Tony grumbled. “You are the worst. But fine. If you won’t help, we’ll figure it out on our own.” He put his finger to his lips in concentration. “It obviously started because of the tabloid article.”

“No, it actually did not,” Thor cut in out of nowhere, causing everyone to turn to him.

“Uhhh, yes, it did,” Tony said.

Thor shook his head. “The Little Spider was okay with the article,” he said. “It was being questioned about it that displeased her.”

Something began to prick at the back of Maria’s mind. 

“He does have a point,” Bruce said. 

“So what?” Steve said. “If it’s not the article that bothered her, it’s what? Maria wondering why it didn’t?”

And the pieces fell into place.

Maria blinked.

The first time they had all played truth or dare.

_“Truth, Romanoff,” Tony said. “Do you currently have a crush on someone in this room?”_

_“No.”_

_“Oh, my god! You’re totally lying!” Clint stared at her in fascination. Natasha glared at him._

_“I am not.”_

_“You think you don’t have a tell. But you have a tell. She’s totally lying!”_

_“You’re drunk.”_

_“I am. But you’re still lying!”_

_“I bet it’s Steve,” Bruce said._

_“Please,” Tony said. “It’s obviously me.”_

_“In your dreams,” Natasha grumbled._

_Tony smirked. “No. But obviously in yours.”_

And then the last time they had played, three days before the party.

_”I have one for Natasha!” Clint turned to look at her, a devious smile across his face._

_“Oh, god,” Bruce muttered. “Nat, you might want to run.”_

_“I dare you,” Clint said, drawing out the words, “to convince Stark’s other guests at the party this weekend that you and Hill are a couple.”_

_“What?” Maria said._

_Natasha shrugged. “I could do it.”_

_“I bet you can’t!”_

_“You know I can,” Natasha said. “You’re on.”_

_“Don’t I get a say?” Maria said._

_“Apparently not,” Steve said, shrugging at her as Natasha and Clint shook hands to seal the deal._

Maria turned to Clint now, realization settling in. “She told you to give her that dare,” she said.

Clint raised his head to meet Maria’s eyes. She knew she was right. “I didn’t say a word,” he said, and he went back to watching TV.

•••

Sneaking up on Natasha might as well have been on the list of the world’s most impossible tasks. So was finding her if she didn’t want to be found. Maria had learned both those lessons years before. But she also knew Natasha couldn’t hide forever. The others could be content for a few days just lounging around and hanging out, but she couldn’t. She was too used to always having something to do, some place to be, that she had never quite learned what to do with free time.

Which in this case worked to Maria’s advantage because when Natasha wanted to get away, she went to the training room. All Maria had to do was wait for her.

And wait she did. Cross-legged against the far back wall, in the dark. Until four in the morning when the woman she had been waiting for finally appeared.

Natasha took two steps into the training room and stopped. The only light on was the light seeping in from the door open into the hall, but it was enough. Maria could see Natasha look straight at her, and she knew Natasha knew she was there.

She also knew Natasha was not going to be the first one to speak.

Maria got to her feet, slowly. She stuffed her hands in her pockets and walked forward until she was barely a foot from Natasha. Natasha watched her carefully, but she didn’t move. Her face, like almost always, gave nothing away.

“You know you could have just told me,” Maria said.

“Told you what?”

“That you wanted to kiss me.”

To the testament of her incredible self-control, Natasha did not move an inch nor did her expression change at all. Maria took another step closer to her. 

“I didn’t mean to hurt you,” she said.

This time Natasha arched a brow.

“I’m not embarrassed by the photo in the paper,” Maria continued.

“No,” Natasha said. “Just horrified.”

“No,” Maria said. 

“Then what?”

“Angry,” Maria said. “That moment was personal. People Stark invites to his parties shouldn’t be leaking it. We have enough to worry about without that.”

Natasha frowned slightly. Maria thought she was maybe mulling things over. It was hard to tell with Natasha sometimes.

“So why are you here then?” Natasha finally said. Maria took a breath. It was now or never.

To hell with never.

“To tell you I don’t regret what happened,” she said. “Any of it. Not the stuff during the party. Not the stuff after the party.” She paused, took another breath. “To tell you I don’t regret _you_.”

“It was just a dare.”

“You know it wasn’t.” Maria took another step to close the gap between them, but it was Natasha whose hands grabbed Maria’s shoulders and it was Natasha whose lips connected with Maria’s, hard and intense. Maria smiled into the kiss. Almost automatically her hands trailed down Natasha’s sides, slipping under the hem of her tank top and sliding over the smooth skin underneath.

But then she paused.

“Nat,” she whispered into the other woman’s mouth. “You need to be sure about this.”

“Are _you_ sure?” Natasha’s fingers slid under Maria’s shirt. Maria’s fingers found and stilled against the scarred skin on Natasha’s hip.

“I wouldn’t be here if I wasn’t,” Maria answered, pulling back so she could study Natasha’s face, her hands starting to move again.

“I’m sure,” Natasha said. In the dim light of the room, her eyes almost glowed.

“Are you? Because you know if we do this, they’re all going to know within the hour.” Maria’s hand found the waistband of Natasha’s yoga pants and dipped inside, immediately sneaking inside her underwear and stroking the soft tuft of hair she found there.

Natasha nodded, her hands finally finding their way underneath Maria’s bra. “We can deal with them.”

“And you know if we do this, they are never going to stop teasing us and asking us questions.” Maria’s fingers kept going, exploring the soft, warm folds they found, rubbing soft and slow circles as they went.

Natasha made a sound that might have been a whimper. Her thumbs grazed over Maria’s nipples. 

“We might even have to kiss for them,” Maria continued. She pulled her hand out of Natasha’s pants, quickly grabbing the waistband and yanking them, along with her underwear, down her legs. She leaned forward and fused their mouths back together, one hand cupping the back of Natasha’s head, the other returning to its place between her thighs.

Natasha moaned into Maria’s mouth as Maria leaned her backward until Natasha got the hint and sank to the ground.

Maria broke apart from their kiss. “Would you be okay with that?” she asked her, already beginning to kiss her way down Natasha’s body as one of her fingers finally achieved entrance. “Having to deal with the men?”

Natasha nodded, her movements slightly jerky. “Yes,” she almost hissed as Maria added a second finger. 

Maria had one last question.

“You know Stark is taping this right now, don’t you?” She licked at Natasha’s belly button and then trailed down further to nip at the inside of her thigh, twisting her fingers inside her as she did so. Natasha groaned, her back already arching.

“Yes,” she managed to gasp as Maria slid in yet another finger. “But it’s fine. I can … oh-”

Whatever Natasha was going to say died out on her lips as Maria’s mouth latched over her clit and sucked hard. A few minutes later, as Maria felt Natasha clench around her, her name a moan on the redhead’s lips, Maria decided she was perfectly happy to just ask her later.


End file.
